Whoops, I had actually forgotten I was writing this but this is the last of my 2011 wrapup pieces, promise. I think it’s a common misnomer that critics enjoy trashing bad movies. It can be painful to sit through a bad film so - with the exception of “Season of the Witch” which I saw during a Nic Cage-a-thon - it’s not something I would subject myself to intentionally. I skip most things that seem like a complete waste of time so you wont find “Jack & Jill” or “Chipwrecked” or “The Zookeeper” on my list because I haven’t seen them and have no plans to. Below are the films that, despite their best intentions, just did not work for me in 2011.
1. This Must Be The Place (Paolo Sorrentino)
A complete disaster. Sorrentino’s last film “Il Divo” was a crazy rock ‘n roll mashup of Fellini and Scorsese. I was excited for his follow-up, an English language film starring Sean Penn as a Robert Smith-type aging rock star who goes on a road trip across America to find an ex-Nazi war criminal who imprisoned his father. At the time I thought, “this is so crazy it just might work!” but now I know that it’s the synopsis for one of the worst movies of all time. This makes it’s U.S. premiere at Sundance in a few days so consider this a warning.
2. Cars 2 (John Lasseter, Brad Lewis)
Painful. This film is everything Pixar had previously stood against - cash grab sequels, cheap pop culture gags, nonstop action in place of character development - which makes it like a knife in the back from your best friend. It’s all the more upsetting to see Pixar head and co-director Lasseter continuing to defend the film instead of just admitting he made a mistake. Critics don’t have it out for you, John. We’re just not going to tell you that you’ve made a great film unless it’s true.
3. Sucker Punch (Zach Snyder)
A confession that may get me kicked out of the movie nerd community: I actually like Zach Snyder! At the very least he’s one of the most distinctive genre filmmakers working today and I have a soft spot for his “Dawn Of The Dead” remake, “300” and (most of) “Watchmen.” But “Sucker Punch” is a different story all together. Poorly written, ugly, and uninvolving, Snyder is totally lost and mostly incompetent without existing source material to guide him. There are no stakes, no consequences and nothing invested. It’s worse than bad, it’s boring.
4. The Green Lantern (Martin Campbell)
Marvel has had a real resurgence in the last decade but I’ve always been a DC kid at heart. So it’s unfortunate that both DC and Warner Bros. (who’ve done such a great job with the Batman franchise) had a bomb this big on their hands. It was definitely risky material: a cocky lead character, an otherworldly setting and yet another clunky love story but somehow Marvel made all those obstacles work with “Thor.” But “Green Lantern,” with its cartoonish CG, bad acting and an overstuffed plot was not so lucky.
5. I Saw The Devil (Jee-woon Kim)
I’d heard quite a bit of good buzz about this Korean revenge thriller before I went to see it this time last year. But my hopes dissapated almost instantly as I watched this relentlessly stupid film. As I said in my review, imagine the (perfect) ending of “Se7en” stretched out for 2 1/2 hours and you’re somewhere close to the tedium of “I Saw The Devil.” I’m convinced that people assume that because they’re reading subtitles the film is somehow smarter than it is because if this had been made in English it would have been laughed out of theatres.
6. Season of the Witch (Dominic Sena)
Okay, this is cheating a bit since I knew this would be horrible. January release? Silly action/horror plot about hunting down witches? Check. Nic Cage? Check. Yes, this was going to be bad. But unfortunately it was - with the exception of Stephen Graham’s hilarious New Yawk accent - pretty blandly bad. Cage was very subdued here which is not why you go to see a bad Nic Cage film. Thankfully “Drive Angry 3D” a month later was pretty awesome.
7. Scream 4 (Wes Craven)
I loved the “Scream” films when they were released. The first one still stands up as a genre classic even if the sequels are a product of diminishing returns. But this was something else entirely. Original cast members are dragged back and given nothing to do while the new castmembers are an even greater waste of space. I found myself squirming through the film, not because of the violence, but because I felt bad for everyone involved.
8. Circumstance (Maryam Keshavarz)
The first and worst film I saw at Sundance last year, this Iranian drama actually took home the Audience Award at the fest. Though I suspect that had more to do with the films sympathetic backstory (the filmmakers had to escape Iran to make the film) than the film itself, where story threads disappear, slo-mo happens all too frequently and the film really just runs out of steam. “Circumstance” was marketed as some kind of steamy lesbian drama which, probably would have been more interesting.
9. The Hangover: Part 2 (Todd Phillips)
Take the first film, Find And Replace “Vegas” with “Thailand” and Delete all the jokes. (Sorry Zach.)
10. Twixt (Francis Ford Coppola)
I was at the world premiere at TIFF and did my best to be fair in my review of the film because I do like everyone involved but it was an extremely amateurish production. How the same filmmaker who made “The Godfather,” “Apocalypse Now” and even “Bram Stoker’s Dracula” was responsible for this I will never know.
Dishonorable Mention: Fright Night, The Sitter, Take This Waltz, Detachment, Hobo With A Shotgun.
circumstance
film
i saw the devil
listomania
scream 4
season of the witch
sucker punch
this must be the place
worst
the hangover: part ii
twixt
fright night
the sitter
take this waltz
detachment
hobo with a shotgun
cars
green lantern
A complete disaster. “This Must Be The Place,” which received mixed reviews when it premiered at Cannes, had been one of the films I was most curious about this year. Though there’s still no U.S. release date set, I was able to see it last week where it was in wide release in Paris. In the film Penn plays an almost catatonically depressed (another one!) retired rock star who sets out on a road trip through America to find a hiding Nazi war criminal who imprisoned his father during WWII. Yeah, it’s another one of those. He leaves behind his (completely normal) firefighter wife Frances McDormand and sets off for adventure. So where does the film go wrong? Pretty much everywhere it can.
To trace why I wanted to see this movie in the first place is to go back to Italian writer/director Paolo Sorrentino’s last film, “Il Divo” a Fellini-meets-Scorsese account of Italian Prime Minister Giulio Andreotti. It was funny, strange and one of my favorite films of 2009. But like so many foreign auteurs, the transition to English language film is not a smooth one. For starters, Penn’s performance is all whispers and giggles and it’s just painful to watch for nearly 2 hours. But I can’t completely blame Penn for trying something so out there, I have to blame co-writer/director Sorrentino for not stepping in and suggesting adding some range to the performance. The film has endless (supposedly comedic) shots of Penn’s character looking out of place in whatever environment he happens to be in but this also grows old fast.
The overwrought final act, which makes it clear the film has things to say about growing up, dealing with fame and uh, Nazi war crimes, elevates the film to a rarefied company of spectacularly bad movies. In hindsight that image of Penn dressed as a Robert Smith-like rocker complete with lipstick and wigged out hair should have been sufficient warning but I just wanted to believe a movie with a premise this outlandish could actually succeed. Unfortunately it was too crazy to be anything other than a complete mess for both Penn and director Sorrentino. The film is so strange and so bad that I can only imagine it’ll turn into a cult oddity at some point. Personally I can’t wait for it to be released in the U.S. just so I can read the sure-to-be-hilarious Videogum review.
film
review
this must be the place
Someday I’ll actually go to Cannes but until then I’ll continue to watch from the sidelines and pick the handful of movies I’ll see when they’re eventually released. And honestly,most of the lineup usually ends up playing at the New York Film Festival in the fall.
1. Drive Ryan Gosling stars as a Hollywood stunt driver who moonlights as a getaway driver during a heist gone wrong in this arthouse action film from “Bronson” madman Nicolas Winding Refn. The film boasts an impressive cast including Carey Mulligan, Christina Hendricks, Bryan Cranston, Albert Brooks and Ron Perlman and word out of Cannes was very, very good.
2. The Skin I Live In The latest film from Spanish auteur and @whatsfordina favorite, Pedro Almodóvar (“Talk To Her,” “Volver”). This twisted tale about a plastic surgeon on the hunt for the man who raped his daughter reunites the director with Antonio Banderas for their first collaboration in more than 20 years. Word from the Croisette has been mixed but I’ll likely get to see for myself when it premieres at the NYFF this fall.
3. The Artist This one really came out of nowhere. A silent, black and white film about a silent film star on the cusp of the sound age. This one got snapped up for distribution by The Weinstein Co. just before the fest began and it’s a good thing too because reviews were very strong. The Playlist called it “a joyous, big hearted tribute to old school moviemaking” and gave it an “A.” I’m definitely curious.
4. We Need To Talk About Kevin It’s definitely not going to make anyone feel good but in the hands of the right filmmaker, grief can be worthwhile. Tilda Swinton stars as the mother of a teenage boy who went on a shooting spree dealing with her grief and heavy emotions ensue. Reviews are again, very strong though so I might just have to dive in.
5. This Must Be The Place Sean Penn stars as a Robert Smith-like aging rock star who sets out on a road trip to find the Nazi war criminal who executed his father. I had been looking forward to this one a lot more before it screened and word was decidedly mixed. In hindsight I should have seen it coming, the premise is too insane to be anything other than terrible.
(Though both “Midnight In Paris” and “Tree Of Life” premiered there, I’m leaving them off this list because I’ve already seen them/will be seeing tonight.)
cannes
film
listomania
drive
the skin i live in
the artist
we need to talk about kevin
this must be the place
1. Moonrise Kingdom
dir: Wes Anderson (The Fantastic Mr. Fox, The Royal Tenenbaums, Rushmore)
Anderson’s 7th film is set in the 1960’s as 2 twelve year olds fall in love and run away from their New England town. Cast includes Bruce Willis, Edward Norton, Bill Murray, Frances McDormand, Tilda Swinton and 2 yet-to-be-named pre-teens. As much as I’ve been disappointed by his recent films I’m still hoping he’s got another classic in him. This could be it.
2. The Tree Of Life
dir: Terrence Malick (The New World, Days Of Heaven, Badlands)
This was in the same spot last year but now we’ve got a trailer and an actual release date. The film features Brad Pitt and Sean Penn as father and son, (in the 1950’s and present day), and will probably be beautiful (as long as it’s not boring.) I’m pretty sure the dinosaurs are out, though.
3. The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo
dir: David Fincher (The Social Network, Fight Club, Se7en)
Fresh off his Best Picture win for The Social Network, (you know it’s going to happen), Fincher has turned his attention to an adaptation of the first installment in the incredibly popular Millenium Trilogy. I saw the Swedish original and had a hard time picturing anyone turning it into something interesting but if anyone can do it, Fincher can. (Benjamin Button notwithstanding.)
4. Hugo Cabret
dir: Martin Scorsese (Kundun, The King Of Comedy, Boxcar Bertha)
Martin Scorsese ditches Leonardo DiCaprio for the first time in a decade to adapt this book about an orphan living inside a train station in 1930’s Paris. The film stars “Hit Girl” Chloe Moretz along with Christopher Lee, Sacha Baron Cohen and Jude Law among others and will be filmed entirely in 3D. (Not kidding.)
5. Super 8
dir: JJ Abrams (Star Trek, Mission: Impossible III)
I’m not sure exactly what this is about and I like it that way. I do know it stars Kyle “Coach Taylor” Chandler, Elle Fanning (who was amazing in Somewhere) and appears to evoke an 80’s era Spielberg. JJ Abrams loves “mystery boxes” and next summer I’m going to open one with Super 8 inside. Watch the teaser.
6. Contagion
dir: Steven Soderbergh (Che, Traffic, Erin Brockovich)
In case anyone thought Soderbergh was taking it easy this year, (after releasing 4 films in 2009), he’s already got 2 films ready to go for 2011. The 2nd of which is Contagion, a CDC centered action-thriller with a huge cast including Matt Damon, Kate Winslet, Marion Cottiard, Gweneth Paltrow, Jude Law, Bryan Cranston, etc. etc. He doesn’t need to retire, he just needs to slow down!
7. Haywire
dir: Steven Soderbergh (The Informant!, Solaris, Out Of Sight)
That other Soderbergh film, which will be released first, is Haywire. A gritty spy thriller described as “if Alfred Hitchock made a Pam Grier movie”, this one stars mixed martial arts fighter Gina Carano backed by another sizeable cast including Ewan McGregor, Michael’s Douglas & Fassbender, Bill Paxton and Antonio Banderas. I almost got to see it last month but apparently that was impossible.
8. Submarine
dir: Richard Ayoade (TV’s ‘Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace’)
This one came out of nowhere at the Toronto Film Festival where it got ecstatic reviews and I decided I had to see it as soon as possible. The quote that got me was: “A coming of age story which is equal parts Rushmore, Election and Squid and the Whale.” and if everything works out that will hopefully be in about 4 weeks at Sundance. Please let everything work out.
9. The Descendants
dir: Alexander Payne (Sideways, About Schmidt, Election)
Somehow it’s been almost 7 years since Payne’s last film hit theatres. In that time there’s been a lot of Payne-lite, (The Weather Man, Up In The Air, etc.) but there’s no substitute for the real thing. George Clooney stars as a man trying to reconnect with his 2 daughters after his wife suffers a boating accident. He will probably find himself in painfully awkward/funny humiliating situations.
10. The Skin That I Inhabit
dir: Pedro Almodovar (Broken Embraces, Volver, Talk To Her)
This one is going to be dark. Antonio Banderas reteams with director Almodovar for the first time in 2 decades starring as a plastic surgeon hunting for the men who raped his daughter. Yikes! But I’m sure it will still have the directors trademark color palette, a beautiful score and a tone that switches from melodrama to comedy and back again. I hope.
11. Drive (Nicolas Winding Refn)
Ryan Gosling is a stuntman who moonlights as a getaway driver. From the (insane) director of Bronson and also starring Carey Mulligan, Christina Hendricks, Albert Brooks and Bryan Cranston.
12. Hanna (Joe Wright)
It looks like a remake of The Professional from the director of Pride & Prejudice. Starring Saoirse Ronan, Cate Blanchett and Eric Bana. Watch the trailer.
13. Your Highness (David Gordon Green)
Unofficial Pineapple Express sequel, set in medieval times, swaps Seth Rogen for Natalie Portman AND Zooey Deschanel. Sounds like an upgrade. (Sorry Seth.) Watch the trailer.
14. Harry Potter & The Deathly Hallows Part II (David Yates)
The last last finally last and final Harry Potter film. I can’t wait. No spoilers.
15. Cowboys & Aliens (Jon Favreau)
I’m still not sure how much I trust Jon Favreau to direct action, but I do trust Daniel Craig to be a badass. And it would be great for Harrison Ford to have a role that wasn’t terrible. Watch the teaser.
16. Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy (Tomas Alfredsen)
A Cold War espionage film starring Thomas Hardy, Gary Oldman and Colin Firth would be exciting. But that film directed by the guy who did Let The Right One In is a must-see.
17. This Must Be The Place (Paolo Sorrentino)
The insane director of Il Divo brings you Sean Penn, (dressed as Robert Smith from The Cure) stars as an aging rock star who sets out to find his fathers executioner, an ex-Nazi war criminal.
18. X-Men: First Class (Matthew Vaughn)
I had about zero interest in an X-Men reboot until I saw Kick-Ass and they set the film in the 60’s. Now I have a lot of interest. They even hired January Jones so I keep picturing Mad Men-era X-Men and I can’t not love that.
19. Sucker Punch (Zach Snyder)
While it looks way too CGI heavy for my liking, it also looks insane. And once every 2 years I kinda look forward to a Zach Snyder film. Watch the trailer.
20. The Muppets (James Bobin)
A brand new Muppets film, from the writers of Forgetting Sarah Marshall and the director of Flight Of The Conchords. It might actually work.
Also released: While We’re Young (Noah Baumbach), Young Adult (Jason Reitman), Source Code (Duncan Jones), Beginners (Mike Mills), War Horse (Steven Spielberg), Paul (Greg Mottola), 30 Minutes Or Less (Ruben Fleischer), The Sitter (David Gordon Green), Wanderlust (David Wain), Bridesmaids (Paul Feig), The Hangover Part II (Todd Phillips), Twixt Now and Sunrise (Francis Ford Coppola), The Cabin In The Woods (Drew Goddard), One Day (Lone Scherfig), We Bought A Zoo (Cameron Crowe), The Adventures of Tintin (Steven Spielberg), Mission: Impossible: Ghost Protocol (Brad Bird), Cars 2 (John Lassetter), The Green Hornet (Michel Gondry)
contagion
film
girl with the dragon tattoo
haywire
hugo cabret
listomania
moonrise kingdom
submarine
super 8
the descendants
the skin i live in
drive
hanna
your highness
harry potter
cowboys & aliens
tinker tailor soldier spy
this must be the place
x-men: first class
sucker punch
the muppets
